Relationships

Is Your Relationship Filled With Bliss, Or Do You Find Yourself In A Relationship Living Your Worst Nightmare Over And Over Again?

No matter where you find yourself in your relationship, there is always room to grow, there is always a chance to heal your relationship. Knowing yourself and your part in your relationship is empowering. Be the change you expect in your partner.

Take a step today and look inside of you, begin to realise that you are the centre of your relationship. With our Transformational Coaching System™ Let me guide you on your journey of Self-Discovery, whilst you create a relationship with yourself that will positively affect all your relationships. (We spend all day talking to ourselves, how do we talk to ourselves all day long?)

Relationship Baggage

Remember that breathtaking moment, that moment the person of your dreams walked into your life?

Filled with euphoria you stepped onto life’s path together. The honeymoon phase absolute bliss. Your partners little quirks didn’t bother you at all, in fact some of those little quirks attracted you to each other. This feeling was so amazing you just want it to last forever.

Then that dreaded day arrived when you both started unpacking your baggage.  Suddenly those butterflies in your tummy start to disappear and the reality of life set in, little quirks start to become irritating, forgotten responsibilities came knocking at the door. The roller coaster ride had just began.

For some the roller coaster reaches the top where the view is spectacular and the bliss of the downhill ride worth all the pain. For others the roller coaster just never seems to get to the top,  always slipping back just before reaching the top, the bliss in the relationship has disappeared.

So one day you decide to get off the roller coaster and just sit on the fence and just observe from the side line, believing your heart is in a safer place. At first it seems quite pleasant to just sit on the fence neither in nor out of the relationship. Little did you know, you were sitting on a barb wire fence (the pain of sitting in no man’s land) eventually the barb wire starts boring holes into your flesh and you know you have to make a decision.

When children are added to this picture the pain is even worse. As you sit there you realise your heart is torn, weakened in self-esteem and confidence, simple everyday choices seem impossible let alone choosing the best path forward for you and your children. So you decide to give it another go and sacrifice yourself for your children, doing your best to keep everything together, you do your utmost to get your partner to see life from your perspective, at first it appears enough then one day you awaken to the realisation that everyone in your family including your children are unhappy.

Something has to change.

The realisation sets in,  the only person in this whole picture that can change is you, only you can make a difference in this relationship. The change within you may be what is required to save your relationship…

My relationship appeared like a fairy-tale to me, a heavenly whirlwind, a dream come true, I was going to marry my soul mate, the man of my dreams and start my own family. Our romance blossomed as I choose to become unconscious to the baggage being unpacked before my very eyes, undoubtedly it was the same for both of us.

Suddenly Life just seemed to come at us at a rate of knots. Our lives a mine field of outside challenges and losses of pregnancies and our first born baby girl, born with Down syndrome. We loved her so much, and didn’t realise the stress her condition put on our marriage, she passed away a day before her first birthday. Overcome by grief our marriage took on a whole new dynamic, as we both processed our traumas in very different ways different ways.

Aware of the high percentage of divorce after loss of a child, we thought we could weather this storm without outside intervention.

We went on to have 2 beautiful very lively boys, however the fear of loss was ever present, my over protectiveness added to the underlying tensions, frustrations were vented, resentment and blame were on the rise, we knew we were in relationship trouble.

So at first I decided to sit on the fence, neither in nor out, at times I decided to get back in and got hurt, and so the game of Victim, Perpetrator began, give and withdrawal took place on both sides. The flip side coin of love reared its ugly head as we openly showed our frustration and resentment towards each other. Eventually our bubble burst and sadly we separated as the pain of our loss ultimately was just too much for both of us to bare.

Life Coaching gave me a rude awakening as I realised my part in the dysfunction of my marriage, I realised I was living on the effect side of life, not taking any responsibility for my part, it was so much easier to blame, when the blaming was done, I realised that all the emotions were still in side of me. It was time to look at my side and take responsibility for my life.

Today as I write I am ever grateful for my marriage, for my 3 beautiful children, for everything I learnt for having someone who pushed me so hard to this point of awareness. There was nowhere to hide, I had to wake and become aware that I created my won reality, everything I experience in my life is because of my thoughts, my choices, my inner state of being and my allowing.

My outside world was a great reflection of my inner turmoil.  What happens out there is merely showing me what is happening inside of me. I began realising the most important relationship in my life was my relationship with myself.

Embark with me on a journey through the Transformational Healing system to heal your relationship with yourself.

Techniques such as Negative Emotional Therapy will allow you to let go of negative emotions that seem to hold you captive. We have so many beliefs around relationships, many of them negative beliefs, empower yourself letting go of these beliefs. T The more you let go the less others are able to control and manipulate you, become responsible for the creation of your own reality…

Become the change you want to see in your relationship. Our powerful tools and techniques will guide you on this incredible journey. Rebuild your relationship from an empowered space… Give your children a chance to enjoy a functional family whether living together or separate.